April 15, 2008

so it looks like i might not be that poor after college after all.
my total loans for next year should be about $20,000.
assuming my finances stay in about the same situation for the rest of college,
we’re looking at a total of about $58,000 in loans.
that’s two new cars, rather than a new house.
which is slightly better, although $58,000 is probably
close to four times how much i’ll be able to pay for my first car.

i was talking to Sara earlier and i guess it’s very strange to her
that Micah and i are already planning for after college.
i told her that $58,000 isn’t too bad, between two people,
since he’ll only have about $5,000 or so of loans.
is it strange that i’m already planning like that?  i don’t know.
i don’t really care, i suppose, so what does it matter?
last semester i had this sort of fear
that maybe we both meant it because we were so far apart
and we both wanted to mean it.
but something changed between then and now and
i’m not afraid, really, at all.
when he tells me “forever” i really do think “forever”.
not in the bright, dreamy kind of way;
not naively.
more like the
“forever” of laundry and dishes and
being tangled up with him in our bed
forever of the mundane but never bored.
at any rate.
we’ve made it this far.
why not that much farther?


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